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I just need to pull the car into a parking space. DATING

  • View author's info Posted on Jul 06, 2015 at 01:49 PM

    And then I went VAMOOSE.  Bye bye Miss American Pie.  You see, when someone conveys false information regarding her physical appearance, I take that as a justification for me to jet outa' there.  This girl from Lynn was nothing like what she described herself to be over the phone, so I decided to be a cad and scram.  Silly silly me.  Shallow Toytoy.  She's gonna' cry ninety-six tears. 


    By the way, I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that Hillary Clinton is a worthless puke and that Bernie Sanders is experiencing a surge in popularity.  The poll numbers reflect this.  Say bye bye, Hillary.  She's gonna' cry ninety-six tears.

  • 2Comments

  • View author's info Posted on Jul 09, 2015 at 05:06 AM

    An angry five hundred pound alligator was sitting on my front porch.  Now, I have a couple of dozen pairs of alligator shoes. 


    If you get attacked by a giant alligator, what you need to do is bash its head in with a cricket bat.  Don't ever dare say that I never did any favors for you.

  • View author's info Posted on Jul 06, 2015 at 01:51 PM

    I just burned my chicken legs.  Bummer!