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I have a question

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Is there anyone out there who might know the difference between a book case, a stair case, and a mental case?  Can anyone possibly differentiate between a book case, a stair case, and a mental case?  Well, if you throw a book case down a stair case, chances are you are a mental case, especially if you stare at people while you are walking backwards.  Doesn't that irk you? Also please tell me, if you can, what they call it when a dog barks and throws up at the same time?  Do they call it a bark barf or a barf arf, or maybe a woof ralph, or how aout a gag wag or a pup chuck?  Recently my neighbors have decided to go on vacation, and they put me in charge of taking care of their pet dog, so I was wondering if you might have or if you might know of a used pooper scooper for sale or for lease.  Now this would have to be an extra large pooper scooper, since we are not talking about a toy poodle here.  Also, I will be willing to travel hundreds of miles in order to rent this used pooper scooper provided I can get it for a reasonable price.  Can you help me with this?  You sure?  I will even be willing to pay a referral fee.