Ladies, Help Me Out with This.................... Romance Forward to friends

  • View author's info Author Posted on Feb 18, 2005 at 03:41 PM

    What is up with "I Love you like a friend/brother". I have been out to clubs and a few dates. Met alot of lovely woman, some have been great friends.

    However recently been dating someone, for about 4 months and everything was great, I thought. After a night of Dinner, Drinks and Dancing. Like always walked her to her door. However, after I got my usual hug and thank you for a fun night. I got," I love you like your my brother, you are so good to me" That threw me for a loop because the way we were dancing at the Club If we were brother & sister we should see a therapist right away.

    Ladies what's up with this Let's be friend first and then leave the guy in the Friend Zone.

    Just My Honest Opinion
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  • View author's info Posted on Feb 24, 2005 at 06:56 PM

    On your profile you stated that you were not looking for anything ltr and that might be why she contacted you. She maybe at a spot in her life where she too may not be looking for anything serious. You may both have different ideas of casual dating.
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 24, 2005 at 01:56 AM

    I'll meet you there!!!

    I'll be arriving on June 28th! What about you??

    I'll be drinking free drinks waiting to meet up with you!!
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 23, 2005 at 09:11 AM

    Your Right Southern.....Its time for a vacation. VEGAS BABY!!!!
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 23, 2005 at 12:41 AM

    Hey Doe!

    Sounds like you need a vacation!

    Do I hear slot machines and cocktail waitresses calling you??

  • View author's info Posted on Feb 22, 2005 at 06:06 PM

    Doe Bear,
    Everything I read in response to your issue is very true. If she wanted to take it to the next level or even thought there was a possibility you would know. The point I wanted to add however is how to look at your situation from an advantage point....If this young lady is "cool" and you enjoy her company...see if she has other "cool"friends. Now I know this is going to cause a lot of eyebrows o raise but I'm dead serious. When you have single friends (especially of the opposite sex) hang out and take notes about what they have to say about their other single friends. Now, don't rush off and say "Hey, hook me up w/ your girl" because 1. that sounds tacky, and 2.the friend you use to wine & dine as a prospect may get offended and shut down on you. Then, where will you be?

    So listen when she talks, if she's talking about her friend Sue ask questions (where is Sue's man?, what does her man think of this?,etc.) all your friend will think is that your enthralled in the conversation. If she mentions that she and Sue went shopping you might want to tease lightly "Man, where does Sue work?,I need to work there!" this way you've found out if Sue has a job,if she's good with budgeting her money,etc. Now I am by NO means saying use your friend or do anything to hurt your friend. I'm just suggesting if there is absolutely no way you guys are going to hook up and you have GOOD intentions...then go for yours. I have done this several times with my male friends who considered me their sister and it works! And 9 times out of 10 your friend has already talked you up anyway! However sometimes that can backfire just look at the situation from all ends and keep your options open.-xoxo
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 22, 2005 at 04:55 PM

    Hey Doe-

    Basically, she's telling you that she's not sexually attracted to you.

    Just chalk it up to experience and know that it's her loss.

    Good luck.

  • View author's info Posted on Feb 22, 2005 at 10:00 AM

    Thanks for the input Ladies,

    My friend and I had a long talk and we came to the conclusion that Friends would be in the best interest for our relationship. Which is totally cool.

    I hope everybody had a good 3 day weekend.
    Talk to Ya Later
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 20, 2005 at 09:21 AM

    Ok, as a person who has personally DONE that, I could have a possible explanation. For me personally, its the safer way to go. Its sometimes scary to put yourself out there, make yourself vulnerable to others. Its easier to put the "friend" moniker on a sweet,kind guy than to take the chance of being in love. I have done that a few times, much to my own regret! Anyway, that could POSSIBLY be a reason...
  • View author's info Posted on Feb 20, 2005 at 02:59 AM

    That can be rough. I have a guy friend who is like my brother and we do some pretty wild dancing, but our boundaries were established well ahead of time.

    The best thing I can tell you to do is be honest with her. Tell her where you see the relationship going and ask where she sees it going and then try to see if guys are on the same wave length.

    If you're not then you need to decide if you want to stick around or if you should accept the friendship and move on to the next deserving lady.
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