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Friends and The Intimate Encounter
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Posted on Wed, Jan 05, 2005 13:57

I've always noticed some strange things on dating sites. On this one, I've always noticed what you want as far as relationships and and the next course of action. You have 5 or 6 different catagories. There are friends, friends and more, casual dating, etc. The one that has always confused me is friends and intimate encounter. What exactly does that mean? I noticed on most of the ads I read that some of you are looking for the friendship/intimate encounter. However when you read the ad further, it then says you're looking for the long term relationship. Now, to me, it's always meant something different. You look for someone under that heading... you find someone... you become friends and you have a NO-STRINGS ATTACHED intimate relationship. My question to the rest of the forum here is what does it mean to you and why would you have it on your profile. If you have met the person online and you're willing to take that extra step, how far IS that extra step? Is chemistry a big issue? Are you just looking for fun and a roll in the hay? What happens if both or one of you don't feel the same way? I'm not being judgemental. I'm just trying to create a different topic. Are you looking for that discreet relationship, the "not-so-discreet" and just want to be buddies in bed and where ever else or are you just looking to turn that friendship into something more (possibly marriage or the long term "living" or "non-living together" arrangement)? Do you just want to live life to the fullest plus have you cake and eat it too? What are your comments? I would love to hear from you (men or women) or just e-mail me directly here or post at the forum. Hope to hear from you.



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Posted on Thu, Jan 06, 2005 19:55

Very good question Marvel, I am sure a few of us have wondered about that...I would like to know the answers to those questions as well...hmmm
I have indicated friends on my profile, because i think this is how a relationship should begin, and the rest is up to the person and i to decide which step to take after that...but i am certainly not just looking for a "roll in the hay" lol..But then again that's just me, it's not who i am...

  


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Posted on Thu, Jan 06, 2005 17:38

I found that catagory odd too. I'm not into casual sex myself. I have to feel something for the person I am with. However, if I found that "right" person, I would consider relations prior to, uhmmmmmm, say marriage, as I have learned the hard way that while sex is not the most important part of a relationship, it does have an important role. Compatability in that department is a definate plus!!! *blush*



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Posted on Thu, Jan 06, 2005 03:59

Very good topic Marvel... First you should ask yourself what is the definition of chemestry for some people. I for one am looking to meet some nice men to date, have a friendship with. If there is "chemestry" between us then possibly the benefits that JC talks about.. and then of course if we are totally compatible then a longer term relationship. Doesnt neccisarily have to be marriage or other living arrangements. What I dont want is someone who thinks that all I want is a roll in the Hay. Some of us women like to be wined and dines and be taken out in public. Of course while posting this message, I dont think and hope that I did not put that particular wording in my profile.. But to be honest, for me its all about trust, companionship, being able to feel comfortable with the person and yes my version of chemestry before I would go the "next step". In todays day and age, you would think more people would be more careful about those "intimate encounters" however I have gotten emails from men who want to be intimate first then friends later... Sorry but in my book it doesnt work that way..

Again.. One womans opinion.
and again a wonderful topic you have started.. I hope this helped.

  


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Posted on Wed, Jan 05, 2005 21:56

Yo Marvel, maybe we should suggest they change it to a "freinds with benefits" catagory. LOL!!! Serously I too have wondered the same thing when I saw that. Cheers !!!

Jim



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