Leftover Things.... Funny jokes and anecdotes

  • View author's info Author posted on Apr 18, 2006 at 15:38

    God was just about done creating the universe, but he had two extra things left in his bag of creations. so, he decided to split them between Adam and Eve.
    He told the couple that one of the things he had to give away was the ability to stand up while urinating. "It's a very handy thing," God told the couple, who he found under an apple tree. "I was wondering if either one of you wanted the ability". Adam jumped up and blurted, "Oh, give that to me. I'd love to. Please, oh please, oh please, let me have that ability. It would be great. When I'm out working in the garden or naming the animals, I could just stand there and let it fly. It would be so cool, I could write my name in the sand. Oh, please God, let it be me who you give that gift to." On and on he went, like an excited little boy who... well... had to pee. Eve just smiled and told God that if Adam really wanted that so badly, he should have it. It seemed to be the sort of thing that would make him happy and she really wouldn't mind if Adam were the one given this ability. He was so happy, he celebrated by wetting down the bark on the tree nearest him and laughing with delight all the while. And it was good.
    "Fine," God said, looking back into his bag of leftover gifts. "What's left in here"? "Oh yes," he said, "Multiple orgasms..." And Eve just smiled
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  • View author's info posted on Apr 24, 2006 at 06:39

    Nice one JerseySapphire... for some reason it made me think of this from way back when I was in pigtails:

    God made little girls
    He made them out of lace
    He didn't have enough
    So he left a little space

    God made little boys
    He made them out of string
    He hd a bit left over
    So he left a little thing
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