Some of these might help you get that 5 star hangover, lol
SYMPTOM: Drinking fails to give taste and satisfaction, beer is unusually pale and clear.
FAULT : Glass empty.
ACTION : Find someone who will buy you another beer.
SYMPTOM: Drinking fails to give taste and satisfaction, and the front of your shirt is wet.
FAULT: Mouth not open when drinking or glass applied to wrong part of face.
ACTION: Buy another beer and practice in front of mirror. Drink as many as needed to perfect drinking technique.
SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet.
FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle.
ACTION: Turn glass other way up so that open end points toward ceiling.
SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet.
FAULT: Improper bladder control.
ACTION: Go stand next to nearest dog. After a while complain to the owner about its lack of house training and demand a beer as compensation.
SYMPTOM: Floor blurred.
FAULT: You are looking through bottom of empty glass.
ACTION: Find someone who will buy you another beer.
SYMPTOM: Floor swaying.
FAULT: Excessive air turbulence, perhaps due to air-hockey game in progress.
ACTION: Insert broom handle down back of jacket.
SYMPTOM: Floor moving.
FAULT: You are being carried out.
ACTION: Find out if you are taken to another bar. If not, complain loudly that you are being kidnapped.
SYMPTOM: Opposite wall covered with ceiling tiles and fluorescent light strip across it.
FAULT: You have fallen over backward.
ACTION: If your glass is full and no one is standing on your drinking arm, stay put. If not, get someone to help you get up, latch yourself to bar.
FAULT: You have fallen forward.
ACTION: See above.
SYMPTOM: Everything has gone dark.
FAULT: The Bar is closing.
SYMPTOM: You awaken to find your bed hard, cold and wet. You cannot see your bedroom.
FAULT: You have spent the night in the gutter.
ACTION: Check your watch to see if bars are open yet. If not, treat yourself to a lie-in.
If you have never had a REAL hangover, you just aren't trying. Had one so bad in college at the start of spring break and was taking the train from New Mexico to California. All I wanted to do was take my head off and put it in the seat next to me and not bother it. Instead, I drank a warm six pack of beer and rejoined my head in alcoholic bliss. Now days it seems if I do the responsible thing and have just a couple beers, I get that killer headache, which makes me mad because if I'm going to be in pain, I should have gotten drunk and enjoyed the trip.
Nothing wrong with Tequila...she says, holdin her head, coz its so gonna fall off.
Found this, so thought I would post it..
Do you have feelings of inadequacy? Do you suffer from shyness? Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Tequila...
Tequila....is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Tequila... can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything. You will notice the benefits of Tequila... almost immediately, and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past, and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Tequila...
Tequila... may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Tequila...However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it. Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.
I agree, that was very funny. Makes me glad I don't drink like that.... I have always wondered why anyone would want to live through the hangover... was the drinking worth it? LOL ..... Does sound pretty painful I must say. Have fun ladies.... I guess someone has to stay sober to drive all of you home.. LOL
Loki I was a tequila v1rg1n up until about 4 months ago , i had 4 shots of the lick sip suck thingy ... and all it gave me was a burning bellie, thats rocket fuel I can now say can stay on the shelf.... lol
My hangover remedy is a big glass of water and 2 panadol before sleep ... works WONDERS
been there, done that- but only a few times. I'm one of the few, the lucky- those who don't get hangovers very often. I have low blood sugar, so all I have to do is eat a candy bar after I drink my last drink- and no hangover. Except when I drink beer- which works like an immediate emetic. Or when someone who knows me steals my candy bar out of my purse!