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Is a profile an illusion?
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Posted on Mon, Apr 11, 2005 22:38

I've discussed this before many times. Sometimes you get that profile, with or without picture that just reaches out to you and says "come contact me". Then there are others that send you the "wink". its too good to be true and sometimes it's just that. A while ago, I contacted someone because I was reading her profile and I thought she was awfully nice. I was thinking that I would maybe get to know her better. Well she contacts me about a couple of weeks later. We exchange e-mail addresses and we decide to chat. GOD, that was such a mistake. She swore so much and was so graphic she would make an entire navy blush. You couldn't tell if she was man, womnan or somewhere in between that. There were points where I just wanted to end the chat. Luckily after the chat was finished I had erased her e-mail address and blocked her instant messages over here and at the big Y. Don't get me wrong. I'm not a prude. If anything, I'm very open about intimate discussions. BUT I don't think it should be started with... well... you get the idea only because the good people at Large Friends are monitering the discussions. Don't worry... there's a point to this... and again I say "buyer beware". Reading that profile may be one thing but actual contact is something else. Hope to read your comments on this subject...



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Posted on Thu, Apr 14, 2005 22:47

amen to that browneyes!



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Posted on Wed, Apr 13, 2005 22:05

What is probably worse are the ones who come off so into you and invest much time along with phony promises of meeting. making you feel so incredibly special, "Soulmate", blah blah... and spent many hours getting to know me, and dropped out of site, or ran when confronted. I say meet someone right away, or within a reasonable time frame or they are just playing mind games....

  


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Posted on Wed, Apr 13, 2005 10:44

Marvel, too bad you had a bad experience. I just hope things get better as you go along. From reading other posts in the forum, I guess it is common that people sound better in their profiles than they do while chatting or in person. Thankfully, that has not been my experience. The man that I am involved with is exactly like he explained himself to be in his profile. As a matter of fact, as I read between the lines, I thought that maybe he would be too intense for me and that I would not be a good match for him. But I was wrong and I am glad that he was persistent and that I let my guard down and got to know him. It just so happens that he is exactly the kind of man that I have described in my profile. Go figure!! I asked for what I wanted and got it!!

  


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Posted on Wed, Apr 13, 2005 07:39

this is why you may have to weed through a bunch of rudeness and ppl that just dont fit what you are looking for in order to find someone that really peaks your interest. the thing is you should just trust your gut on this one. if it doesnt feel right , then it is very possible that it wont be right for you. you just need to keep looking until you find what is right for you

  


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Posted on Tue, Apr 12, 2005 13:08

Hopefully my profile is a 'reach out an contact me' kind of one! ha!

Anyhow - I've had similar experiences. For me it's been at the call stage where you realize that something isn't just quite right for you...sometimes it's the language or the sense of humor which doesn't match yours, the actual intellectual level (sorry, this sounds snobby but you know what I mean) or just the vibe of the voice. And I'm not suggesting that these people who I don't vibe with are bad people, they just aren't right for ME.



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