Island? As in warm, tropical and sunny? Ahhhh... If it has sugar-white sandy beaches and water so clear you can see the bottom no matter how deep, plus surrounded with palm an long needled pine trees, well count me in! (I'm thinking of western Florida, here! LOL)
Definately count me in! I'll bring the soda and some other non-alcoholic drinks. Plus, it never hurts to make a giant bowl of my own recipe potato salad! LOL (Hey, I got an 'A' on it in my college speech class!)
I'm only hoping that this wonderful island doesn't have any sharks to devour me as I'm swimming! LOL
Hmmm...I'll have to pack a lot of bathing suits! ROFL
Ok load up the picnic basket I want a ticket to this Island and I am more than willing to cook all of you dinner, Fetticine alfredo with chicken and mushrooms, with a nice wine be ok or do you want something more traditional. Hamburger and hotdogs just as good for me.
Thanks Jenny!!!Gemini your not coming along with the rest of us?We all have to stick together,Oh what fun it would be!!I am going to bring enough donuts to share with everyone,Jenny what are you bringing?My mouth is watering right now thinking about it.(Warm chocolate donuts and milk)YUMMY!!
You guys have me laguhing,I am going to get us all on that island one way or another, then we wont have to put up with anybodys crap!!!But it is truely ashame,people cannot see beyond the outside of others,how shallow is that,I am a people person, i love people,we all were created different for a reason and i love that,I am big, but i also love a nice big clean man who takes good care of himself,i admire people, just good people who love themselves, no matter what size they are, it is just ashame most people do not feel the same way.
I don't think it matters if somebody is a size 2 or 24, small or xxxxlarge What matters is whether people are happy or not.
We waste so much time comparing ourselves to others that we miss the point of it all which is just trying to be happy or not being alone.
I stopped along time ago comparing myself to other peoples expectation of physical beauty.
What I have learned is that it doesn't matter the size, people are searching for the same things, happiness, love, companionship, emotional support, sense of belonging, intmacy, romance. Those are the important things.
The trouble is most people can't see beyond the outside fascade and see they could get all those needs met. they are to stuck on what they percieve to be beauty. Rockchick's experience is perfect example of that.
For me it's all about getting those basic needs met for love, I really don't care if its with a size 2 or a size 24 as long as the important stuff is their.
Being alone rots, so I am not going to pass up an oppertunity to be with somebody based on a image placed in my head by the media.
Hey it may not count for much but it's my 2 cents and ramblings.
I was going to marry a guy from a small town in PA who normally likes women with p*rn star bodies (funny coming from someone who is about 80lbs overweight himself!!) .... anyway he thought he could "overcome" the fact I am a big girl cause he loved my personality and he thought I was attractive ... so when I got to the USA, his little boys birthday was coming up and i threw him a party .... so I started meeting a few of his friends and MOST were lovely ... except one couple who ignored me most of the night and couldnt even look at me ... so a couple of days later, i decided to ask Mike what their problem was... and he said "oh its just that they arent used to seeing me with a girl as big as you" so I said "Can u run that by me again ...?? just cause I am big doesnt mean my BRAIN is made of LARD!!!" , and to make matters worse the female of the two was also overweight by about 50 lbs ... I couldnt believe it, needless to say I didnt have anything to do with them for the rest of my stay ... and Mike and I have since split (3 yrs now) cause of his shallow behaviour .... more fool him, but lucky for me that i didnt pick up and leave a country I know and love to be miserable with him ... there is such emphasis on body image all over the world, and its just as bad in australia as in the states I think ...... but there are MANY descent people who dont worry about that kind of thing, and they are REAL people ...
i think that women have it harder then men and i think it again comes down to the programming of society. I think it comes back to the whole men as protectors thing - Men should be big and strong and able to protect their small, timid and fragile women - thus men can carry extra weight and its not such a big deal. Its like this progressive society of our cannot keep up with the way people and their needs have changed.
I also think that women tend to be a bit more accepting of mens physical 'flaws' than men are of womens and i would go so far to day that women are more critical of their own and each others than of mens. But society puts a lot more focus on womens physicality than on mens.
I hope one day society puts more focus on health than looks and realise that a healthy curvey is more attractive than an unhealthy thinness. In the mean time book me a seat on the boat to the island!
You are funny, Y2K, (Forgive me for not getting your name right). But don't let people's comments discourage you. I have found that people who make those half-a##ed kind of "compliments" are really just expressing their jealousy. It messes with their programming to see that a plus-sized woman is also a beautiful woman because they have been taught the opposite for so long. So instead of getting angry, just pity them for they don't know how to deal with the fact that they have been lied to, bamboozled and hoodwinked.
PS: My boyfriend and I are great fans of chocolate donuts. Let me know when you move to that island. We would like to visit, but I am warning you now that the only ting that I am sharing is the chocolate donuts!!
I must say I have to agree with juicy_y2k. Society has told us that we are unhealthy, lazy, stupid and just plain unattractive if we're "overweight". I am none of the above. It seems we, as BBW's, BHM's Plus Size people, etc (insert your own phrase here) we have to try 3 times as hard to prove that we are not any of those things. I am not lazy (I'm a single mom of a very active 6 year old boy so if I don't do it, no one will), I am not stupid (I have my own opinions and on occassion, I do come up with brilliant ideas lol, I'm not unhealthy (I have thin people in my family with high blood pressure, diabetes and high cholestoral, none of which I have) and most importantly, I'm not unnattractive just because "society" says I am. I, for one, am tired of trying to prove myself, so I quit doing it. It all goes back to learning to love yourself. If you project confidence, people will see it. If they don't, their loss, not mine.
The truth is in this society size does matter.The bigger you are the less attractive you become in the eyes of most people around you,that does not mean we should not accept ourselves and love ourselves, it just means it is a lot harder to do so when you have everyone in your ear telling you how important being thin is,as the saying goes "you can never be too rich or too thin",this is what we see all around us,i dont know about you guys but i feel relly crummy sometimes watching those so called plus sized models on tv who really do not reprsent women who wear size 14 and over,they use small women to model plus sized clothing and underwear because America is not ready to see a victoria secrets model with lots of junk in her trunk or extra rolls surrounding her thong, it is just the truth,i get angry about it, but it is a battle I or no other plus sized person can win,also I feel it is alot more acceptable for a man to be bigger than it is a woman,we have it alot harder,does anyone else feel this way?I mean i know i am beautiful ,people tell me everyday,i tell myself everyday but i am just sick of people telling me oh, you have such a pretty face why dont you lose some weight,I want to rip somones eyeballs out for real.Another thing, people always assume fat people do not exercise,but i use my treadmill everyday,i am not dieting but i am active, you know what,i feel like moving on a island with nothing but other fat people who want to eat chocolate donuts all day and have intercourse.
I guess I have to say the same as many of you have said - You have to love yourself first before you can love anyone else. When I was a lot smaller and a lot younger, I never thought I was worth much because of my size. I spent a lot of time hating myself. But, as I got older and smarter, AND joined a plus sized group, I found a lot of folks liked me for who I was and size had little to do with it. I've also met a few guys who were sure BBW's were desperate, and they learned their lessons from me, as I'm neither desperate nor full of self hatred and I certainly don't sleep with just anybody! LOL I'm glad that a lot of ladies can find nice guys on here to write to, but for those not getting any letters, don't be afraid to write some to the guys you find interesting! In all fairness, guys have been absorbing all the rejection from when they ask ladies out of any size. Don't be afraid to take a chance and ask the guy! I did and found a really sweet guy whose personality I fell in love with. Unfortunately, I haven't met him yet, because he is on the other side of the country finishing a work contract. But, at least he has a good work ethic...I always try to look on the good side of things! LOL Still, we talk every night and laugh about a lot of things.
I think personality has to be the most important thing in a relationship. Remember this-no matter how gorgeous either one of you is, if you want to grow old with this person, you have to like his/her personality, and there is no one in their 90's who is free from wrinkles and has a "perfect" body. But, the personality will pretty much remain the same. Don't give up! I think there is someone for everyone, it all depends on what you are looking for in a relationship.
I would take a sense of humor and a great personality over looks any day! girls seem to have a lot more self esteem issues than guys, just curious,do guys get judged on looks as much as females? It seems like society is easier on them but I am probably totally wrong. Any one know?