Home > Plus size Forums > love > It shouldn't be this hard : ( Previous topic Next topic
Jump to:
It shouldn't be this hard : (
Author
Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Sun, Oct 30, 2005 12:28

It shouldn't be this hard to find love. I mean I' one of the good girls that nobody seems to want. I'm begining to think that the supply of good men is running out! What do you think?
It shouldn't be this hard to find love. I mean I' one of the good girls that nobody seems to want. I'm begining to think that the supply of good men is running out! What do you think?



Reply / add comments      Quote      Report abuse   Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Sun, Aug 13, 2006 16:08

Don't get discouraged by the trash that's out there, there are great people out there that want nothing but the "real thing", its just a matter of making the right connection!

I have my own success story, I did it and would love to share with you!

Hi my name is elle, I am a Certified Empowerment Coach that specializes in Dating & Relationships.

Could you use some help finding your perfect match? I found true love right here on LargeFriends and so can you!

On-line dating does work; it takes time, determination and persistence. It's truly the perfect forum to meet who you desire, yet, you have to be determined to remain consistent in your search and not detour from your desires just to have companionship.

There are many factors to the success of meeting the right one for you, yet, choosing wisely, is the most critical factor. The site you choose, the text in your profile, your responses, who and when you agree to meet, etc, are all essential to finding the perfect match for you.

As a Dating Coach, I can work with you on a personal level to design a specific plan of action that would clearly communicate exactly who you want to share your life with and ultimately, lead you to your perfect match.

I look forward to hearing from you. In the meanwhile, have a great day!

elle

Finding True Love is Possible when YOU stay TRUE to YOU!

Available only
to logged in members


Reply / add comments      Quote      Report abuse   Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Wed, Jul 19, 2006 12:58

dreaming1976 write:
It shouldn't be this hard. It's discouraging thinking one has to go through all this to meet one guy. This is what I'm getting for taking control of my destiny...nothing. The bottom line is I have NO idea what a guy wants. Being a nice girl never really gets you anywhere. *sigh*


My bet is that the reason you're having problems stems from your being very pretty. Lots of guys find that intimidating. That plus the fact that most guys see a pretty woman, they assume she has dozens of guys better than him to choose from. Just my 2 cents.

BTW, nice girls are ALWAYS better

  


Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Mon, Jul 17, 2006 11:01

It shouldn't be this hard. It's discouraging thinking one has to go through all this to meet one guy. This is what I'm getting for taking control of my destiny...nothing. The bottom line is I have NO idea what a guy wants. Being a nice girl never really gets you anywhere. *sigh*



Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Sat, Apr 29, 2006 09:44

The problem that I've encountered the most, in the past, is that a guy is into me UNTIL he meets my friends. All through high school and college, any guy that I liked would like me until meeting my friends and then he would be chasing after them. My two best friends are 1)5 foot, blonde hair, blue eyes, and an absolute sweetheart; and 2)size 2, pretty, and naive. I love my friends to pieces, otherwise I wouldn't have been friends with them for so long. But it has been a struggle with good guys falling for my friends and even coworkers, no matter what. By the way, my friends are married with kids, and they still get hit on more then I. Can't take them anywhere...sheesh. LOL!!



Reply / add comments      Quote      Report abuse   Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Wed, Apr 26, 2006 09:52


Too true Rashaka ....;. seems to me there are too many people on here using all their energy whining about the opposite sex instead of being decent, positive and getting on with their lives.



No whining here... most of the good guys I know are married, some to wonderful women and some to women who have no business messing up a nice guys life. I just noticed that a lot of the nice guys that end up married to the not so nice girls are often tricked buy the woman's beauty and the way she acts toward him when she is trying to git him, they git married and all the sudden everything goes to hell cause she caught him and doesn't care anymore how her behavior effects their marriage... next thing I know I'm at a bar listening to a band and this girl I know is married to a great guy is all over the men at the bar and I think to myself "And it's women like her that take all the good ones and leave women like me with the bottom of the barrel selection" then I laugh at my own stupidity cause I know this isn't the real reason I don't have a man. So if you read my post, remember no matter how whiny I sound, I'm laughing at myself the whole time I'm typing it.



Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Sun, Apr 16, 2006 13:53

Rashaka write:
Hate to be the bubble buster here, but...

Women aren't the only ones who get dumped on all the time. Most of the good guys get scared off by the douches of the world, and work themselves to death.


Too true Rashaka ....;. seems to me there are too many people on here using all their energy whining about the opposite sex instead of being decent, positive and getting on with their lives.

Anyone who hasn't been dumped on has probably lived a very sheltered life. And most of us have probably dished some out as well as being on the receiving end. It's a fact of life; not one of the nicer facts but it helps toughen us up and make us who we are. Get over it!



Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Sat, Apr 15, 2006 04:09

Hate to be the bubble buster here, but...

Women aren't the only ones who get dumped on all the time. Most of the good guys get scared off by the douches of the world, and work themselves to death.



Reply / add comments      Quote      Report abuse   Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Thu, Apr 13, 2006 11:29

Cathii write:
I chuckle at the saying * all the good men are taken*... where are they taken and are they truely happy??? coz a *good man* doesnt cheat.

Never settle for less than what you think you are worth!!!


The good men have been taken by the evil skinny bimbos in mini skirts. It's all part of their evil plot to steal all the "good men" for their "looks personality = perfection" plot. In order to rule the world they have stolen the genetic stock of all the smart, kind, and nice guys. They have taken them to a secret lab built in the parallel world that exist in their compact mirrors. Mean while in our world all the "good men" are legally married to those often times... (cant say that word) hummm, OK I think I got it... LOSE women and are miserable cause of the "good man" genetics prevents them from less than socially acceptable behavior like cheating on their wife.

Like my story? It's true... I swear... OK, it's not likely but it seemed like a good excuse why their is no "good men"

  


Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Mon, Nov 21, 2005 16:40

Finding love is hard because it is such a precious thing. Until this year, I thought that all of the good men were taken because in all of my years of dating, I could not find a good man. Two years ago, after my last failed relationship, I decided to do really look at myself and think about why a "good woman" like myself had experienced so many bad relationships. Besides the fact that all of my love relationships had been with men, the only common denominator in each relationship was that "I" was in them. So I had to deal with "I"--me--myself. What was wrong with me? To be honest, the thing that was wrong with me was that I did not actually think that I deserved love. Yes, I wanted to be loved and I had a lot of love to give, but I chose--yes "I" chose to waste my love on men who did not deserve it. Men who were not ready for it. Men who could not recognize it. And yes, in all cases, the men that I had been with over the years fit one--sometimes more--of those categories. Please don't think that I am bashing men. I'm not bashing them. I don't blame any of them for our bad relationships, I blame me. And I blame me, because I saw red flags and decided to ignore them. I saw things about these men that I know were not right--or right for me-- and decided that I wanted to be with them anyway. Why did I want to be with them? Because I wanted to love someone. I SAID that I wanted them to love me also, but that is not what I seeked. And it definitely is not what I received. I don't know if I said this before, but I did not love myself. No, I did not love me. I thought I was ok, but I also thought that i was unlovable. Where I got that from would probably take lots of money to pay for many therapy sessions, but I know that I felt that I was unlovable. And of course, no woman wants to be wrong, so I chose men who would fulfill my prophesy.
To make a long story short, after crying and screaming and just feeling like nothing, I just thought about what I wanted in a man and went for it. No, it was not easy, but I do know that being honest with myself helped me get the man that is the love of my life. And yes, I know it is the real thing because he told me that "he just wants to love me".

Sorry to blubber on, but I was anxious to share.



Reply / add comments      Quote      Report abuse   Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Fri, Nov 04, 2005 16:56

I'm new to this website today... I can't find myself when I do a search. Maybe it takes awhile for my profile to be accepted? If you know anything about this, please let me know.

I too wonder if all the "good men" are taken. My girlfriends and I don't want to be negative but we are really starting to believe it! We are great catches and have alot to offer someone. We just want someone who appreciates us. Seems like most men want stick figure women with big chests. I am shapely... I have had boyfriends. Maybe it's my age and where I am living (Los Angeles). I don't know, what do you think is the problem?

  
Available only
to logged in members


Reply / add comments      Quote      Report abuse   Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Tue, Nov 01, 2005 18:16

Well that's just how life goes. In reality finding love will have nothing to do with how you look or don't look, how much money you have or don't have, how nice you are or aren't, and etc. Finding love will ultimately come down to finding someone who connects with you on such a deep mental and emotional level that they can learn to live with the few issues they may have with you (and everyone has issues with their significant other ... they just learn to live with them or move on ... since you'll never find anyone whom is a 100% fit).

You, me, and everyone else on this site will just have to keep on looking until we find that special one to bring in another kind of hapiness and such into our lives.
Well that's just how life goes. In reality finding love will have nothing to do with how you look or don't look, how much money you have or don't have, how nice you are or aren't, and etc. Finding love will ultimately come down to finding someone who connects with you on such a deep mental and emotional level that they can learn to live with the few issues they may have with you (and everyone has issues with their significant other ... they just learn to live with them or move on ... since you'll never find anyone whom is a 100% fit).

You, me, and everyone else on this site will just have to keep on looking until we find that special one to bring in another kind of hapiness and such into our lives.



Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Tue, Nov 01, 2005 10:10

i believe people have themselves fixated on a certain type of person, you don't have to accept less than the best but maybe the type of person you are fixated on doesn't and will never have the qualities you are looking for. make a good effort to look into the heart of a person before you make judgement, especially in a person who treats you well. you may be forever searching if you limit your possibilities. you have to ask yourself, what would you do with the right person when u find thim. i am a nice gut but find as much as women say they want a nice man that treats them well they make every effort to run over me, why is this? look past vanity and other preconcieved notions and u just might find your true love. let's work together and not against one another, making every effort, this is the key. you have to let go of some of yourself to share your life with another. all in all you will eventually find the right one for u, they are out there, keep your options open, don't limit yourself to certain looks or personality types, let go of some of self to recieve that one that is for u. you don't have to compromise yourself principles or ideas, and u shouldn't, just leave your options open so that u will notice that nice person that is for u when they come your way. may your search come to an end soon, for whatever u are looking for i hope u find it, but be careful what u ask for, it may not be what u are willing to recieve are give for that matter. i believe live that u have to give out what u expect to recieve, if u don't u will find yourself with a bad copy of what u want. remember to keep your options open, limited options lead limited possibilities.
i believe people have themselves fixated on a certain type of person, you don't have to accept less than the best but maybe the type of person you are fixated on doesn't and will never have the qualities you are looking for. make a good effort to look into the heart of a person before you make judgement, especially in a person who treats you well. you may be forever searching if you limit your possibilities. you have to ask yourself, what would you do with the right person when u find thim. i am a nice gut but find as much as women say they want a nice man that treats them well they make every effort to run over me, why is this? look past vanity and other preconcieved notions and u just might find your true love. let's work together and not against one another, making every effort, this is the key. you have to let go of some of yourself to share your life with another. all in all you will eventually find the right one for u, they are out there, keep your options open, don't limit yourself to certain looks or personality types, let go of some of self to recieve that one that is for u. you don't have to compromise yourself principles or ideas, and u shouldn't, just leave your options open so that u will notice that nice person that is for u when they come your way. may your search come to an end soon, for whatever u are looking for i hope u find it, but be careful what u ask for, it may not be what u are willing to recieve are give for that matter. i believe live that u have to give out what u expect to recieve, if u don't u will find yourself with a bad copy of what u want. remember to keep your options open, limited options lead limited possibilities.

  
Available only
to logged in members


Reply / add comments      Quote      Report abuse   Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Tue, Nov 01, 2005 08:14

I know that it's been "said to death" but maybe you're just looking in the wrong places. And, keep in mind, some men (myself included) get nervous when conversing with attractive women. Another thing to consider, are you limiting yourself to just certain groups? Maybe if you stopped LOOKING then nice men might just work-up the courage to speak with you. I really don't have an answer to your situation; I wish that I did though. My Sister-in-law is a really attractive woman who lives near Buffalo, NY. She has a really good job with the post office, she's a very shapely attractive 34 year old woman and she cannot meet a nice man. If you do find a solution to this dilemma, then please post the information because I bet that there are a lot of people who would be interested.
I know that it's been "said to death" but maybe you're just looking in the wrong places. And, keep in mind, some men (myself included) get nervous when conversing with attractive women. Another thing to consider, are you limiting yourself to just certain groups? Maybe if you stopped LOOKING then nice men might just work-up the courage to speak with you. I really don't have an answer to your situation; I wish that I did though. My Sister-in-law is a really attractive woman who lives near Buffalo, NY. She has a really good job with the post office, she's a very shapely attractive 34 year old woman and she cannot meet a nice man. If you do find a solution to this dilemma, then please post the information because I bet that there are a lot of people who would be interested.



Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Tue, Nov 01, 2005 03:42

It shouldn't be, but I will agree with the others, it IS hard.

Just don't give up. I know it's cliche, and really cheesy, but as I learned, sometimes you really do find someone when and where you least expect it.
It shouldn't be, but I will agree with the others, it IS hard.

Just don't give up. I know it's cliche, and really cheesy, but as I learned, sometimes you really do find someone when and where you least expect it.



Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Mon, Oct 31, 2005 08:22

Well I like to think I'm one of the good ones, just that big age difference between us.
Well I like to think I'm one of the good ones, just that big age difference between us.

  


Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Sun, Oct 30, 2005 14:30

im sure youre like me - there are guys who are interested but theyre the ones youre not into in return. I keep hearing conflicting messages here, like oh dont be picky and shallow, blah blah blah, but oh btw, dont settle either.
Point is, yeah, it IS hard. I mean, i think im a nice, funny intelligent and rather popular (not sure how that one happened) young woman, but here in real life i get very little romantic intention outwith someone commenting on my bra contents. Online i get some comments here and there but im cyincal, standoffish and even more selective and it's almost harder.
you arent alone, and it's rubbish sometimes, but i guess i have to follow the cliche and say dont worry hon, theres someone out there worth waiting for. Because thats what keeps me going sometimes as well.
im sure youre like me - there are guys who are interested but theyre the ones youre not into in return. I keep hearing conflicting messages here, like oh dont be picky and shallow, blah blah blah, but oh btw, dont settle either.
Point is, yeah, it IS hard. I mean, i think im a nice, funny intelligent and rather popular (not sure how that one happened) young woman, but here in real life i get very little romantic intention outwith someone commenting on my bra contents. Online i get some comments here and there but im cyincal, standoffish and even more selective and it's almost harder.
you arent alone, and it's rubbish sometimes, but i guess i have to follow the cliche and say dont worry hon, theres someone out there worth waiting for. Because thats what keeps me going sometimes as well.



Reply / add comments      Quote      Report abuse   Bookmark and Share
Available only
to logged in members
Posted on Sun, Oct 30, 2005 13:49

I'm beginning to wonder myself. I haven't had much luck. Some, but not much. I found the only schizophrenic SSBBW lover on the planet. Boy was that a hoot. LOL!!!
I'm beginning to wonder myself. I haven't had much luck. Some, but not much. I found the only schizophrenic SSBBW lover on the planet. Boy was that a hoot. LOL!!!