Are you like me? Do you send a wink or two, maybe a few short e-mails and then just let it all slide?
In the past, I've invested hours, weeks and even months on internet relationships that amounted to nothing. Now, I find it difficult to find anything that intrigues me long enough to want to pursue it.
I don't know if I'm burned out or just plain bored
You know, sugaroo, I've so been there. After a while, I'd get a wink or smile or whatever and I'd think, "What the hell do YOU want?!?!" or "YAY! Another sociopath!" or somesuch...or I'd see someone cute or attractive or interesting and I'd want to wink/smile/nod/flirt/drool their way and I'd just think, "Why? Really? Really? Why?" and just blow the whole thing off. If I did surrender and decide to reply, I'd be bitter and cynical about the whole thing and treat it like a joke. 99% of the time that treatment was deserved...they were only after a quickie. The point is, go with your first instinct and intuition. When the right one mails you, you won't feel like this...I speak from experience.
I'm not sure how smaht I am * talking in my Boston accentlol *, but we all need to just step back from time to time and re-access just why we are here and what motivated us to do things in the first place.
I take mini holidays from online antics all the time...and when I come back i try to keep this thought in the back of my mind * it's not all reality but sometimes fantasy is just as good * Take from this what you need too and toss the rest aside.
Chin up darlin...even though this is just a machine..there are REAL folks on the other side..some are more animated than others.
Mary, you sound all too intelligent. I think you definitely know what you're talking about. I think I spend soooooo much time in the "real" world that I find it hard to get into the "fantasy" the internet supplies. and, Beale...I think you hit the nail on the head. If you meet right away, you don't have all that time to build each other up into something you could never possibly be. I find I have much more success just talking to a strange sitting next to me on a bar stool. I don't expect anything going in and am often nicely surprised in the end. Online, you chat and chat and chat and really feel like you know the person, then, you finally meet and the fact remains, the person in front of you is a physical stranger. I guess I'd rather he be a stranger in every sense and get to know him the good old fashioned way, slowly and face to face. Damn, sounds like I'm talking myself right out of this dating avenue doesn't it? I thought it wouldn't hurt to check into this and see what's out there and, I guess I was right because I've had the opportunity to share thoughts with you nice people :)
Thank you for sharing
I have found that if you spend to much time sending winks and writing emails amd even talking on the phone it takes away from when you meet. Obviously it is easier for me to say the sooner you plan to meet the better. I know ladies have to ben more careful. But I wold says if you are interested in someone make a plan to meet in a public place asap and your conversations leading up to it will be better adn will keep your interest.
I understand what you two are saying, but....distance wasn't even a consideration when I posted my topic. I've exchanged a few e-mails with men who are quite close to me geographically.
I mean, for the most part, aren't we all here searching for someone? I guess I'm finding it difficult to invest all that typing time into a long shot.
I know that each time I abandon an online interest, I may have just passed by "THE" one.
I don't know....just wondering if people on this site actually ever hook up and become anything
True to Rock, Internet "relationships" are just that, after a while they die down. You can keep nice friends, but in reality, it is just so many emails or messages you can send, in the long run 99% depends on shorting distances, which is impossible. Although is nice, it is still a dead end. Unless is so "for real" that one or the other moves closer to where you live.
I think we all go through periods of being 'fed-up' or just 'worn-out' and simply don't want to be the one doing all the 'work' in an online chat situation etc. I know I get an occassional wink and such, but unless I emailed them back or gave them a messenger addy..well..I never got any more response and those that did were looking for a very casual relationship or for me to do things for them.. *still laughing over the man who talked to me once and wanted me to bring him a pack of cigarettes cuz he had a bum leg*
Spring is here and summer is around the corner...I find I tend to get re-energized at this time of year and just plain go OUT more. We've been having a rainy spring thus far in New England, but any sunny days you can be sure I'll be out and about not online.
Go shopping and buy yourself something special...call a girlfriend for dinner and a matinee....but don't worry about the online stuff...it has it's time and place and maybe you, like me and so many others, just need a time-out.
Interesting question red .... I have found this has happened to me a few times too ... whether it be me cooling off or the others , I think maybe what it could be is a distance thing for a lot of guys ... not sure about yourself, but with me , cause I am all the way down under, I spose they dont want to communicate with someone who is so far away and cant get to meet in person, and this was way before i met my current mate .... there have been a few guys on here that I found a lot of common interest in but after a wink or short email... it peaters out .... could be a lot of reasons, no real initial attraction ... distance .... theres no real conversation there, whatever the case may be ...as long as there isnt bad blood between the two parties .... we go on drifting..