I love all of ur comments, my husband(now we are living apart) said he couldnt be attracted to me because of the weight I gained over the years, I have alot to offer, I am beautiful, love to hear people say it to me, I soar in the clouds when I hear that Im accepted and loved for who I am not what I look like
you need a new b/f sweetie, my wife weighs 258 and is a beautiful blonde bbw yes iam very attracted to bbw but if she lost weight for health reasons i would miss some of her..lol but i love her no mater WHAT forever and if she gained to 600 lb i would love her the same size does not matter . i do like bbw and am not really attracted to skinny girls. but if she gains or looses i love her no mater what and will allways be atracted to her ,,,find a man that loves you no mater what ,,,,,its whats inside that counts ,,,God made us each special dont let anyone hurt that ,,,,good luck and God bless
you need a new b/f sweetie, my wife weighs 258 and is a beautiful blonde bbw yes iam very attracted to bbw but if she lost weight for health reasons i would miss some of her..lol but i love her no mater WHAT forever and if she gained to 600 lb i would love her the same size does not matter . i do like bbw and am not really attracted to skinny girls. but if she gains or looses i love her no mater what and will allways be atracted to her ,,,find a man that loves you no mater what ,,,,,its whats inside that counts ,,,God made us each special dont let anyone hurt that ,,,,good luck and God bless
Tootsc, you may be older but what you really are is our sister with the best advice! I loved hearing that you have lived the things I was thinking. You are inspiring!
Let me give you a piece of advise and something I have learned over the many years of my life. NEVER and I mean never tell a man continually that you are overwieght, or for that matter anything negative about yourself. We as humans and I am talking Male and Female here. tend to start believing what we hear. I have noticed that the more I tell someone that I am beautiful and pretty and sexy the more they start to see that side of me. But if I do the opposite, then the opposite happens. Its all a mind game. Also, although you feel you need to lose weight as I am sure all or most of us on here feel we should or would like to, You must love yourself first, no matter how big or small you are. Once you are satisfied with who you are and love yourself, you will see that those around you and especially your boyfriend will love you and see how beautiful you really are. You are a beautiful woman, with alot of sensitivity, dont let anyone ever make you think differently. I tell you this all from experience not to lecture. I am older, maybe not wiser, but definately more experienced. I hope I helped, (as always, my opinion only)
Freckles123, you said what I have been thinking........and I believe it's sooooooo important! "I would much rather be happy than skinny!" That was a STELLAR comment!!!! Such a simple idea put so eloquently! And thank you for the compliment, let's chat!
Marchul24, I don't think 'prying it out of him' is relevant, because now you know how he really feels.
The question again is are you willing to be happy with yourself no matter what you weigh? I think most of us here......and freckles123 said it......are beginning (or already do) realize that there is more of us to love than the way we look. We're smart, friendly, funny, wonderful woman who are all in the same boat. If I didn't like myself for who I was, no amount of thinness and cuteness could effect my self-esteem. I am me.........fat or thin........take it or leave it. Find someone who will TAKE it!
You have the power to change the way you feel about yourself. And when you do that, you will change the way others feel about you. A confident fat girl is WAY hotter than an insecure thin girl!
When YOU love you, others will too. Keep fighting the good fight....you found the right place for support!
Hey Southernhux,
You rock! I couldn't agree with you more! I've got a good eleven years on you, and I"m just NOW coming to terms with my body image. It's so nice to hear such positive feedback from a lovely young lady such as yourself.
And directed towards Marchul ( and anyone else who's listening)The truth of the matter as I see it is this: You need to find happiness within yourself before you can expect to share it with others. I relied alot on what my husband and boyfriends in the past thought of me. I developed a eating disorder because of it. Sure i was thin and cute, but I had NO energy and didn't enjoy myself as much because I was so concerned about eating. I personally come from a family that loves to eat. Half of us are big, and the other half aren't. BUT, as long as you are happy with who you are, THAT is what matters. If I had to choose between being the skinny emotional wreck I was, or being a good human being who is "round and fluffy". I would choose the latter. I would much rather be happy than skinny. I think its a matter of finding out who YOU want to be as opposed to your partner. If you balance your food healthwise, eating all your fruits & veggies plus plenty of water... there is no reason to avoid the enjoyment of food.
Hehehe, anyway, that's my two cents on the subject.
Southern that was beautifully said. I do have to say one thing though. Although I am much older than you I too have struggled with weight problems all my life. And yet I found someone or someones in my life. As for Marchul. Well my ex husband told me about the same thing. He said if I kept gaining he would leave me.. I pretty much told him where the door was. Since when we married I was not a Barbie figure by no means and He loved me then why not now. I feel like it was his problem that he just didnt really love me for who I was. There are so many men out there, as you can see here in this site that would love you whether you weighed 110 or 410 because its not about the wrapping paper, its whats inside thats important. Good luck my dear, your real prince charming is out there.. And I say that to the both of you.
Marchul24, some words of advice from an older and wiser BBW...do not ever allow another person undermine your confidence and make you feel bad about yourself. Losing weight for your boyfriend will only bring disappointment. You must lose weight for yourself when you are ready. I also agree with Southernhux, if your boyfriend truly loved you, weight would never be a factor. Remember, you are a big beautiful woman...carry yourself with pride.
Hey marchul24, I think you've come to the right place! This is a site where everyone is a BBW, BHM, or FA.
If I were in your spot, I would first decide how you feel about yourself. Do you love yourself no matter how much you weigh? Do you feel good about yourself in spite of what your boyfriend says? I had some trouble coming to terms with my weight and I still stuggle from time to time. Things that helped me were joining this site, thinking nice things about myself, and reading "Nothing To Lose: A Guide to Sane Living in a Larger Body" by Cheri K. Erdman. She has really great things to say about self-esteem and self-acceptance.
As for your boyfriend.......I hate to say it......and please don't think I'm insensitive, because I have been hurt too, but.........I would get rid of him. I believe that if he REALLY loved you, he would be attracted to you even if you had gained 300 pounds! There are more things about you to be attracted to than just your body!
I think that since you and I are so young, 23 and 22 respectively, these issues are especially sensitive and fortunately there are plenty of people on this site to help us. But please read that book, it's amazing!
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