Is it possible to find the person that you are meant to be with and then it turns out that they are living in a different country. Are people willing to put the effort into establishing a relationship without meeting the person?
Thanks for the kind words, Cory. Yes, the Brit that let me down was actually living here in the USA! That was worse because he was close enough to call and I heard his lovely voice and fell for him rather hard over several months. So I feel very bad that I lost him, but he lost me, too.
I am an incredibly loving person, and tend to forgive and never hold grudges. It wastes too much time and energy. I still want a nice British guy as my life partner. Since I'm looking for the person who will share my life and will hopefully be my 'last love' as it were, I have to be rather picky and get to know him well before making a serious commitment.
I still believe in forever relationships, but, like you, I want to be a lot more careful with this next situation. I really don't want to be hurt over and over, so taking the time to know each other is crucial.
I have a lady friend in the UK who tells me she will help me find a nice English guy! LOL She is certain that I need one to be truly happy, as she found her true love, but I told her it was easier for her as she already lived over there and I want the guy to move over here to the USA with me.
I think taking the time to find 'Mr. Right' is a lot better than just accepting 'Mr. Right Now'!! (giggling) But, I realize that not everyone shares my views and opinions so we must all do what we individually need to do for ourselves. In my case, there is that accent thing-I simply adore British accents and want to be with someone who will always talk to me like that. (sigh)
You hang in there! I hope you find your sweetie, too, which ever country you want him to be from! (smiling)
I have a friend of mine, who I care very deeply for, that lives over 3000 miles away. We chatted for over 3yrs until one day I decided that I was going to fly out to see him.
The ironic part was I really found him to be a cad while intially chatting and they we became the best of friends and remain so. I did go and see him and had one of the best weeks of my life hanging out with him and meeting his family. Course they all said I tawked sorta funny like. LOL!
We both love each other...and I know if his and my situation was different that we'd more than likely be together. I will say..just talking to a person, while nice, does not compare to meeting a person face to face and spending some quality time together. He is a 'macho' kind of man, but the day I left I could see the tears build up in his eyes..he hugged me tightly and I had to leave.
Long distance friendships, loves, etc take just as much work as any other relationship. I know they don't always pan out as folks would like them too, but it doesn't mean you can't fall in love with someone who lives millions of miles a way...I know..because I did. We don't talk to each other as often as we use to because we both have hectic lives, but the one thing he said to me that makes me smile is...no matter where he is, who he's with, or what he's doing..I'll always have his heart.
You don't have to see a person to know they've touched your heart. I treasure my friendship with him, but I wouldnt' recommend long distance romance..because it is a lot of wear n tear on your emotionally and financially. All I can say is thank goodness for phone cards..yipes!
I have to agree with you, Coryb, only I'm the opposite in that I live in the USA and just adore those British accents! (blush) Every British guy I've talked to has been really polite to me and really nice even though in one case I fell really hard for someone's accent and personality, and he fall off the earth or was abducted by aliens or something (giggle) because he just disappeared one day and I never heard from him again. (sob, sniff) Yet, I never lost my interest in having someone with one of those lovely accents as my best friend and sweetheart, though. I am hoping that he will want to move to western Florida with me, as I really don't like living in Ohio. I grew up along the east coast by the sea and want to move down to Florida as I'm sick of being freezing cold and too far from the sea here.
If you are having such good luck with nice American guys, it is because a great deal of Americans really love those English accents! I have a lady friend who lives in the UK and she also has a lovely accent, too. She even offered to find me a nice English guy because she tells me that I need one, since I haven't had a whole lot of luck with American guys so far, and there is the accent thing! (giggle)
Some guys from other countries put down on their profile that they want to find someone American as a life partner. Since I'm a lot older than you are, my new sweetie could be in the age range of being retired as well, so he wouldn't have to work here or anything. In my case as in yours, I'd rather wait to meet someone from the UK. That is unless he is already living here or in Canada which would definitely be more convenient! I'm not worried about a guy's looks, I just want someone with a wonderful personality who would be sincere, honest and faithful and not fall off the earth and disappear! (giggle) Guys getting abducted by aliens not withstanding!! OK, I have a really weird sense of humor! (grin)
I have to agree with WYLDCHYLD. I think state to state wouldn't be so bad. I mean, plane tickets, bus tickets, train tickets, all pretty cheap. Or if they're not too far, driving would be the thing. But again, I think it just depends on how you click with someone. If you know you click and it might really go somewhere, then by all means I'm for it. You just have to be cautious. Make sure the other person is for real.
I don't think I would let distance keep me from someone I have a deep connection with. If you talk to someone for awhile and you have that certain "spark" then you know it's good no matter what. A different country would be hard, but as far as a different state, I can work with that. If you met someone you really, really wanted to be with, nothing would stop you.
I'm not sure about this myself. I guess it depends on how committed the 2 people involved are and how far apart they are. For myself, I think it would be too hard for me because I'd want to see the person more often then every couple of months, at best every other weekend. For me, a relationship is "face time", a BIG part of a relationship, and I want ALLOT of it! lol (Not just for the s*x part, but do just be with them and hang out together) It would be hard to do that in a long distance relationship but again, it depends on the situation and the people involved. Just my .02 worth.
dream1 I am sorry that the long distance thing did not work out for you. I do know people who have met this way and gone onto to be married. I am just wondering if i can still dream of meeting a wonderful man from abroad (its the accent you see and American/Canadian men are soooo polite)I know it would be nice to meet the person sooner rather than later but if i was really keen i could wait. What do you think?
Coryb, i had a long distance rltshp with a guy who live 9hrs away and all the while he decided to live with a girl while still calling me his girlfriend! Long distance relationships are not woth it at all and i don't believe they can last...
Well it's quite possible. However, it's not something that I myself would do since you are possibly setting yourself up for a big disappointment. I for one beliew though that being able to see, hear, touch, and in general be in a persons physical presence is something that ultimately is important to establishing a relationship. Besides without meeting the person they could easier be leading you on and in fact be married, attached or in general passing themselves off as someone they truely are not.
I'm usually willing to give it a shot at least in the U.S. I've just recently been in a somewhat long distance relationship with someone 1000 miles away. And, well, that has now fizzled. Fizzled for him. Not for me.