I am asking this coz its been an issue for me lately.
I am a nurse, working with the terminally ill, and I do work long, and sometimes unpredictable hours.
I have had a couple of meetings with very nice guys via here on LF...But niether of them seem to appreciate that I work every other weekend, and I cant or wont give up my patients....just to see a guy.
I guess I just want to know if its me thats being unreasonable here?
My job, to me, and to others, is important, and I cant imagine giving that up, in any way, shape or form, for a man I have just met?
I know most fellas work all week, and only have weekends free, But I dont have that luxury.....I wish!
I just wish, that others would think about what I do for a living, and make allowances when I say..I am sorry, I cant make this weekend....Ya know?
Life is about compromises when it comes to the people you care about, and not everyone has the same schedule. You work around it and move on.
If a fella can't handle that you're not available EVERY weekend for an initial meeting, how would he ever be able to handle something long term?!
Being a nurse is part of who you are Bubs, and working weekends sometimes is part of that. If these boys can't accept that, it might be time to move along. It's THEIR loss and you'll find someone better who appreciates what you do for these folks in need.
Tell them if they are prepared to support you in the way you are now and will do so for the rest of time, you would be more than happy to cut back. And let them know this doesn't necessarily mean marriage, it just means you'd have more free time and no money worries. I don't have any friends who work regular hours, whatever those are. I'm a guard on graveyard, 10p-6a, with Sun./Mon. off, normally. But we are shorthanded and I only have Mon. off. Then there is the second job with hours all over the clock. I worked Fri. night 10p-6a, then went to the other job from 7a-1p, and THEN did my grownup stuff like run errands and fix dinner so that I could be back at work by 10p. And it's about a half-hour drive to and from work. Normal hours went out with black and white TV. Especially if you want to live in So. Cal. with the bills and rents and GAS prices.
If he's that selfish and insensitive, you don't want them anyway. Since you love your work so much, you need someone who appreciates the compassionate side of you and admires your devotion to people who need you.
No, you're not being unreasonable at all. A large part of who you are is what you have chosen to do career-wise. To change that (which you would have to do to change your hours. I don't know a single nurse that works Mon-Fri, 9-5) would be being dishonest to yourself.