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silv2001
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Posted on Sat, Oct 17, 2009 17:30

We all want that new relationship, right? Reading blogs and profiles I've noticed something. Everyone seems to want that perfect mate that will conform to what we want/need. I've never seen a profile-including my own-that says how willing we would be to change something about ourselves just to be with someone. Maybe we need to act like we did in high school. Remember how we bent over backwards to try to please that one special person. Remember how instantly we would try to change to make that person accept us. Maybe we are to old to remember what we did to be with someone years ago. I totally understand how things have changed over the years and how we have grown and how we all know what we want in a relationship. And I'm sure alot of us were hurt before and we are trying to avoid that pain again but... So, I guess we need to take a step back and ask if some of the things that are a definite must in a relationship isn't just us being stubborn. Granted some things we want can't be changed but there are probably things that we want that could be changed. Who's gonna go first?


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silv2001
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Posted on Tue, Oct 20, 2009 16:16

I guess I didn't say it plainly enough to get my point across Oz. I agree with you that we shouldn't change ourselves just for the sake of a relationship but maybe just examine our 'standards' or qualifications in a mate to see if they are that necessary. BTW wish I was two years older lol


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ozredhead62
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Posted on Mon, Oct 19, 2009 16:04

Yes Silv I think it is too easy for us to into some fantasy land of what we think we neee from another in a relationship. We too often confuse must to wants and forget that we too have a part to play in it. Now I dont agree that you should change yourself to please another for the sake of gaining a relationship, though we all do this to some degree, well at least show our good sides only for a while, lol but overall this situation is doomed. Though I do believe that we need to look at ourself and ask if the type of partner we want in our lives would be attracted to us? Do we have his/her must have'? It is easy to dream of prince charming when you are the pricess, but if you are not the princess and dreaming of your prince, then that is a formula for disappointment. Some of my greastest change has come from understanding where I am compared to my prince charming. You can never change another only yourself. Good topic, thanks :)


Life is only as wonderful as you think it is.

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