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Good Girl - Bad girl or Lightening striking again and again Sort by:
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aimeefla
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Posted on Thu, Oct 01, 2009 14:58

You all remember the two groups of girls in high school. The ones that would and the ones that would not. There was a third group, yes you know it's true, the ones that did but they were not "hard" looking.?

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I'm curious, does this "rule" still work with you guy? If a gal "does it" with you, is there no longer any reapect for her?? Is she out of the running as a partner??? Is she now a women that's in "the other group"????

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Come on guys fess up !!

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Natalie



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butterbll
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Posted on Sun, Oct 04, 2009 00:05

Well,I can only answer for myself here. A womans putting out or not doing so,do not factor in as a factor on her viability as a partner in life for me. Nor does womans past leaisons or lack of them,to me do not factor in to her vaiability of her as a life partner. For we all are not perfect, nor have a spotless virginal record. However to me what happens while we are dating is. How ever I have to say personally It would be a bit of time for me to getting to know the woman that I would be dating. I would have to know her Heart before I would take it to a deeper emotional level for me. As for me the Act of coupling is a deeper spiritual act than just the pyhscal bonding, to me it is an emotional bondng and sharing of our collective spirits. It is to allow one to expand beyond themselves and share of them selves .


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aimeefla
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Posted on Sat, Oct 03, 2009 08:23

Thunder Wrote:"...Aimee I'm not sure what you mean by "HARD" looking ?..."

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Thunder, If you watch the movie Grease, you know that Olivia Newton-John was a "soft" girl.

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At the end, they did her up as a "hard" girl.¿¿ That's one example. Everyone has their taste in how a person looks, outwardly.¿ In high school we, in the 60s, were divided up into those three groups.¿ Hard/fast/easy was one group.¿ Soft/not easy/a challange was a second group and then there were the girls in the middle.¿ Soft and easy.

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¿

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The song "lightening striking again" says it all. He wanted a virgin, but he also wanted to have his fun BUT not with the woman he was going to marry. He wanted her to wait.

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Does that answer your question?

¿

¿



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Thunderheart44
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Posted on Sat, Oct 03, 2009 06:44

I'm sorry to hear that this is happening to you Aimee,I guess we're never to old for these things to stop happening to us.And to respond to you Elaine I believe if I respected the woman before going to bed with her then yes I would call her the next day.The days of putting notches in my bedposts are long gone.I found that for myself I'm a one woman man and sleeping around just leaves me feeling more alone than I did before.Now I'm sure Neoanderson has many notches in his bedposts,thats the guy you should talk to about this !! lol


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Qadesh
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Posted on Fri, Oct 02, 2009 17:43

Hello to all. I can see all sides to this issue. As for myself, I have been having thoughts about dating and all the euphemisms one can put to it. I must preface this with "weird is my normal" and with that being said; I would have to say that I have not had much luck with dating. Do I do the self-torture thing i.e. wondering if he will call again, see me again, etc etc. Well of course I do! lol Then I get over myself and the dated notions I have been brought up believing to be the standard and true. As an adult if the mood strikes me to have a romping good time, then so be it. Lately, I have realized that I am the one that is in control of only myself. I have had to come to terms with myself with regards to having to ask myself if that romping good time was exactly that. I have come to the conclusion that the majority of the time it has not been so for me....the men I think more so. But who would know?! There has not been any repeat performances to gage this information on. And sometimes that is not such a bad thing. I don't have to wonder and the decision has already been made, time to move on. Time to get more comfortable with myself once again, a never ending process. That is why I am more concerning with aging than sex. I am aging and I am not having sex. The delirium oh wait I mean Dilemma over. lol Not that I don't contemplate what it would be like to have some one close, intimate, knowing and wanting to know the being that I am, and all of that jazz. It then leads to my self questioning of am I able to live a shared life again? I am not done with the debate. Let's just laugh at it all, and have some fun, enjoy the irony of it all. Full circle one more time. What kind of karmic debt and how much do I owe?!?! Be well all. Qadesh


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aimeefla
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Posted on Fri, Oct 02, 2009 08:57

I know it's high schoolish, for sure !¿ But I'm running into this with a few guys.

Since September I've put that part of my life on hold. I am learning to be friends with the guys. I"ve noticed a major change in MY attitude towards the intimate side of things.¿ I've noticed a major change in ME with regard to my sexuality also.¿ WHat an eye opener this is and I'm loving it too.

¿

Back to¿ your question, do I put the guy in "player" status that all depends on the "after" treatment. IF he calls to see me again.¿¿ Then no, he wants to continue to learn about me.
I've had the experience of being intimate and then no calls, no nothing afterwards. THIS I don't want to repeat ever.¿ I have a new catagory, is the guy "sturrip worthy" this means am I willing to get a gyn check up before.¿ Well, I know I'm find now "clean crotch" so I won't chance it anytime soon.¿ :-D¿

However, tthat being said, the timing has become critical for me with my "new" thought process about being intimate.¿ I'm trying to wait it out for awhile to get to know more about a guy before I jump into bed.¿¿¿ I don't want to be a casual sex partner.¿ I want a lasting relationship and I want that sooner rather than later.¿ ( I'm 60.7 already ) :-)

I've also noticed that I'm being treated differently by the men in my life. Yes, I'm "seeing" NOT dating, a few men as friends. One of them plays cards¿ once a week with me and another couple. Another guy calls, another one, well we just met last week.¿ One other guy is a very very occasional¿ phone call.

Natalie

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Thunderheart44 Wrote:

Doesn't matter if the guys answer honestly or not Azure your sure to find fault with all or them.Aimee I'm not sure what you mean by "HARD" looking ?I think it all depends on the woman,if you respect her or want her as a partner has nothing to do with how soon you sleep together.At least not for me.And at our age I'm not sure this applies to putting someone in a certain group if you sleep with them,thats very high schoolish.If I respected a woman before I slept with her I will still respect her in the morning.But let me ask you,does your opinion of a guy change if the situation is reversed.Or is he automatically put into the just a player catagory?



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Thunderheart44
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Posted on Fri, Oct 02, 2009 01:08

Doesn't matter if the guys answer honestly or not Azure your sure to find fault with all or them.Aimee I'm not sure what you mean by "HARD" looking ?I think it all depends on the woman,if you respect her or want her as a partner has nothing to do with how soon you sleep together.At least not for me.And at our age I'm not sure this applies to putting someone in a certain group if you sleep with them,thats very high schoolish.If I respected a woman before I slept with her I will still respect her in the morning.But let me ask you,does your opinion of a guy change if the situation is reversed.Or is he automatically put into the just a player catagory?


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