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Posted on Jan 11, 2009 at 08:32 AM

I am a little fairy On tap o' the Christmas Tree It's no' a job I fancy Well, how would you like tae be me? A tarted up wi' tinsel It's enough to mak ye boak An a couple o' jaggy branches Rammed up the back o' your frock An' these wee lights a'roon me I canna get my sleep An' there's the yearly visit Fae Santa - Big fat creep! On Christmas Day I'm stuck up here While you're a' wirin' in An' naebody says "Hey you up there Could you go a Slug o' gin? It's nae joke bein' a fairy The job's beyond belief You've got to go roon' the wean's beds An' lift their rotten teeth But o' a' the joabs a fairy gets An' I've mentioned only some The very worst is sitting up a tree Wi' pine needles up yir bum When a' the fairies meet again By the light of' the silvery moon Ye can tell the Christmas fairies They're the wans that canna sit doon The Christmas tree's a bonny sight As the firelight softly flickers But think o' me I'm stuck up here Wi' needles in my knickers So soon as Christmas time's right by An' I stop bein' sae full o' cheer I'll get awa back tae Fairyland An' I'll see yous a' next year.

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