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Hey anyone have the Keys to this Straight Jacket? Sort by:
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RWGROOT60
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Posted on Wed, Sep 10, 2008 14:19

Well apparently I'm not as crazy as I thought!!!!!!!!!! Who knew? Apparently as some of you expressed to me either privately or in the blogs my ideals are not necessarily out of touch. Very cool. So my next question to you is how do you know when you are ready for a relationship? I am not talking about a FWB, but a relationship. In my comments on the blogs I have been talking about building of the intimate environment between two people, allowing each person to grow both as an individual and as a part of the couple. To me I really didn't know that I was ready until recently. I recognized that the many trials in my life, that included ridicule by peers, my cerebral palsy, epilepsy, my cancer scare and yes even my weight, gave me a unique perspective. I think I had to accept each and everyone of those parts and celebrate what they brought to my life and then be open about it To be ready, I think all you need to be is open, respectful and be able to communicate. I know honesty will popin as a requirement.....but if you respect someone or are open with someone isn't honesty implied. What do you think? How do you know when you are ready?


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bigtom77
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Posted on Sun, Sep 28, 2008 11:37

I think one2one hit it on the head, being willing to open your heart. We all know that when something real or what we thought was real ends we close off our heart completely, after some time we wonder what is out there so we peek in, with the eyes and head but not the heart, not yet. Then we open the heart a little because we talk on here and someone seems nice but were still not open, were guarded. Once we get past being guarded then as we let the light shine in the heart can live and love again. I guess what I'm saying is are you still looking but thinking I'm going to get hurt no matter what? If so were not ready.---Tom


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ozredhead62
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Posted on Tue, Sep 16, 2008 13:03

I know I am ready to start looking again when I can think of my being in a relationship as something positive and exciting.


Life is only as wonderful as you think it is.

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petale46
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Posted on Tue, Sep 16, 2008 12:55

I think one is ready to enter a relationship when one is in peace with oneself. You have to admit to who you are, your faults, shortcomings and missbehaviour. Then you have to accept them and discover what you have to offer which is more then all these negative things. I think humility is an overrated virtue and people tend to be too humble. In doing so they forget about saying what they are good at or what they life about themselves in fear of sounding like they are bragging. So they admit to the worse of them instead of making the best shine. I'm not talking about being brazenly arrogant, I'm talking about being happy with who you are... truly, deeply satisfied. When you are happy with yourself you can enter relationships, whatever type, you can be a better friend, lover, child or parent. It's all about oneself not about others. But that's only my personal opinion.


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one2one
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Posted on Mon, Sep 15, 2008 22:12

I think being ready includes being willing to open your heart, even a little, hopeful that you could meet someone who is wonderful and right for you. I think it means you're really curious about the people with whom you're chatting and e-mailing. I think that it should include honesty and respect, but as it sometimes happens ... yeah, not so much. That really surprised me. Even so ... onward. I'm ready. Omg, am I ready ...


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islandgal64
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Posted on Thu, Sep 11, 2008 10:15

Keys aren't gonna be much help if they put it on properly......

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Katwoman1968
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Posted on Thu, Sep 11, 2008 06:25

Well I have given this some thought. For me it is hard to let someone in emotionally due to trust issues. I think that if you find someone who can see through your walls, hurts, barriers and allow them to see the real you then you are ready. I just have to begin to trust the person and share my thoughts and feelings with him. Then the heart is open for many wonderful possibilities.


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sparkles2002
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Posted on Wed, Sep 10, 2008 15:57

For me in the past it has been easier to be sure of relationships in my life that i didnt want to continue rather than the knowing and recognition of being ready for a relationship when it started. After my marriage break up and several years in a tumultuous on/off relationship, i was sure of the fact that i needed a long time alone to get my independence of mind, body and soul back and maybe then i would know if i ever wanted to share those with someone again. I am lucky with having a good circle of friends and enjoy the company of several friends who have good, long, solid relationships, they are the ones who have shown me and reminded me that relationships do not only cause sorrow and heartache. I think i knew i was ready for another relationship, when i stopped feeling resentful of a past that i cannot change and the realisation that there was nothing i could have done to have changed what happened, it really wasn't ALL my fault. Although i still cannot imagine meeting anyone with an immediate view to a long term relationship, for me it has to start with a friendship and as you say being communicative and open...the respect part both of us will earn & learn if it is right & honest.xx


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aimeefla
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Posted on Wed, Sep 10, 2008 15:35

What a great question. I wish I had a great answer. My only clue is that I was on a single site looking. IF I was not interested by bother paying the fee? Why bother being on if you don't want to be found?? Now what is "FWB"? I should know that right? well I don't I agree that once we accept ourselves we are ready to venture out and find someone. Trust and honesty "should" be implied but I find they are not at all implied. Well maybe I'm wrong. I expect them to be part of the person, but I'm finding that the older I get the more no one wants to talk about their past. We all have pasts, I think talking about that gives the other person a clearer picture. NO not details but highlights maybe. Yes? No? Start with a clean slate????? OY Aimee Fla


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