Ok, it's almost midnight, I have to be at work at 7am, and I can't sleep no matter how hard I try. A lot has happened this week so it's probably because I can't make my mind relax.
My supervisor, Rick, who I adore was admitted to the Hospital Tuesday. He has multiple blood clots and they think he has pancreatic cancer. If he does have it then chancew are it's too late to try and cure him because this is a very bad type of cancer (by the time it he actually shows symptoms...it's too late. I really hope this is wrong.
I still need to put up my Christmas lights, the company christmas party is Sat. and I have another party to take my daughter to on Sunday. Needless to say it will be a very busy weekend.
I'm going stag to the company party, again. I'm ok with it but I am disappointed. Why is it hard to find a date? I wasn't even really looking for a "romantic" date...I would've been happy with a friend to share it with. I've got this gorgeous dress and nobody to wear it for (I feel like cinderella with no prince waiting for me at the ball). I mean, it's good that I'm happy with it but there must be something more. I almost feel like having a date for the annual christmas party is like a club...which I've been denied admission. You know what I mean? I'm just disappointed....I wish some things would change in my life. Honestly, I'm tired of feeling like "the odd man out" at this thing. I do usually have a good time but it could be better. Am I being selfish for wanting it to be better?
It's just been a hard year for me. Hopefully 2008 will be better. Don't pay me any mind, I'm just wallowing for a bit and thanks for letting me vent, as usual. Well, I'm off to attempt sleep again.
Ok, it's almost midnight, I have to be at work at 7am, and I can't sleep no matter how hard I try. A lot has happened this week so it's probably because I can't make my mind relax.
My supervisor, Rick, who I adore was admitted to the Hospital Tuesday. He has multiple blood clots and they think he has pancreatic cancer. If he does have it then chancew are it's too late to try and cure him because this is a very bad type of cancer (by the time it he actually shows symptoms...it's too late. I really hope this is wrong.
I still need to put up my Christmas lights, the company christmas party is Sat. and I have another party to take my daughter to on Sunday. Needless to say it will be a very busy weekend.
I'm going stag to the company party, again. I'm ok with it but I am disappointed. Why is it hard to find a date? I wasn't even really looking for a "romantic" date...I would've been happy with a friend to share it with. I've got this gorgeous dress and nobody to wear it for (I feel like cinderella with no prince waiting for me at the ball). I mean, it's good that I'm happy with it but there must be something more. I almost feel like having a date for the annual christmas party is like a club...which I've been denied admission. You know what I mean? I'm just disappointed....I wish some things would change in my life. Honestly, I'm tired of feeling like "the odd man out" at this thing. I do usually have a good time but it could be better. Am I being selfish for wanting it to be better?
It's just been a hard year for me. Hopefully 2008 will be better. Don't pay me any mind, I'm just wallowing for a bit and thanks for letting me vent, as usual. Well, I'm off to attempt sleep again.
How wonderful that you will have these photos to hold onto and remind you of how special that bond is. And I'm glad you hung in there for the party. I'll bet you looked beautiful. Can't wait for the pics. :)
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LegalEagle224 write: Thank you Blue. :) The lady snapped a picture of Shirley and I looking at each other (a candid shot) and you can see the love. It's simply beautiful. The pictures have really grounded me. No matter what else happens around me, Shirley is the most important thing in my life. Everything else is trivial in comparison.
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LegalEagle224 write: Thank you Blue. :) The lady snapped a picture of Shirley and I looking at each other (a candid shot) and you can see the love. It's simply beautiful. The pictures have really grounded me. No matter what else happens around me, Shirley is the most important thing in my life. Everything else is trivial in comparison.
How wonderful that you will have these photos to hold onto and remind you of how special that bond is. And I'm glad you hung in there for the party. I'll bet you looked beautiful. Can't wait for the pics. :)
Thank you for the advice. I really have reached out and my friends here on LF have been really great. Thank you for the hug and your kindness. Have a great week.
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butterbll write: Melissa At this time of the year a lot of people get in to a funk. but reach out to and lean on your freinds, talk to them a bout the way your feeling. and here is a hug for you.
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butterbll write: Melissa At this time of the year a lot of people get in to a funk. but reach out to and lean on your freinds, talk to them a bout the way your feeling. and here is a hug for you.
butterbll,
Thank you for the advice. I really have reached out and my friends here on LF have been really great. Thank you for the hug and your kindness. Have a great week.
I'm glad you are feeling better. Next time, I'll be your "date"! Two chicks going stag together are BOUND to have alot of fun! LOL!! Glad you didn't let the blues keep you home, and glad you got to show off a bit. Good for you! Lots of love, from TRUE
I'm glad you are feeling better. Next time, I'll be your "date"! Two chicks going stag together are BOUND to have alot of fun! LOL!! Glad you didn't let the blues keep you home, and glad you got to show off a bit. Good for you! Lots of love, from TRUE
Thank you Blue. :) I do feel better...I'm still a bit blue but definitely better. The party went well. I didn't enjoy myself quite as much as I have in the past but I did have a friend (from work) to lean on so it went rather well. I got a ton compliments on my dress and a few admiring looks so that was quite a boost in confidence. It's good to know others saw some of what I saw in the mirror that night. I'll share some pictures as soon as I get them.
I also got some christmas pictures taken of my daughter and I tonight. That was great. She's so beautiful and I looked pretty good too. The lady snapped a picture of Shirley and I looking at each other (a candid shot) and you can see the love. It's simply beautiful. The pictures have really grounded me. No matter what else happens around me, Shirley is the most important thing in my life. Everything else is trivial in comparison. I know that's easier said than done but it's how I will get through....how I've always survived.
Thank you for your support. It means the world to me. :)
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bluegirl2006 write: I understand completely where you are coming from. It is so hard to find those we care for are ill. I hope your boss comes out of this ok. Its harder yet to have to deal with things like this without a partner providing emotional support. But good friends can help too. Don't forget that.
I was single for 12 years after my divorce. I've always felt loneliest at the holidays. You could count the number of "dates" I had in that period on one hand. I know its not what you want but have you considered taking a female friend as your date to the Christmas party? I did that to a couple of company picnics and had a great time doing so.
Hang in there girlfriend. I hope 2008 finds you exactly where you want to be. :)
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bluegirl2006 write: I understand completely where you are coming from. It is so hard to find those we care for are ill. I hope your boss comes out of this ok. Its harder yet to have to deal with things like this without a partner providing emotional support. But good friends can help too. Don't forget that.
I was single for 12 years after my divorce. I've always felt loneliest at the holidays. You could count the number of "dates" I had in that period on one hand. I know its not what you want but have you considered taking a female friend as your date to the Christmas party? I did that to a couple of company picnics and had a great time doing so.
Hang in there girlfriend. I hope 2008 finds you exactly where you want to be. :)
Thank you Blue. :) I do feel better...I'm still a bit blue but definitely better. The party went well. I didn't enjoy myself quite as much as I have in the past but I did have a friend (from work) to lean on so it went rather well. I got a ton compliments on my dress and a few admiring looks so that was quite a boost in confidence. It's good to know others saw some of what I saw in the mirror that night. I'll share some pictures as soon as I get them.
I also got some christmas pictures taken of my daughter and I tonight. That was great. She's so beautiful and I looked pretty good too. The lady snapped a picture of Shirley and I looking at each other (a candid shot) and you can see the love. It's simply beautiful. The pictures have really grounded me. No matter what else happens around me, Shirley is the most important thing in my life. Everything else is trivial in comparison. I know that's easier said than done but it's how I will get through....how I've always survived.
Thank you for your support. It means the world to me. :)
Melissa, just think of your upcoming trip at christmastime every time you feel blue. I know when I am blue I think about my week off between x-mas and new years. It helps some.
Melissa, just think of your upcoming trip at christmastime every time you feel blue. I know when I am blue I think about my week off between x-mas and new years. It helps some.
Melissa At this time of the year a lot of people get in to a funk. but reach out to and lean on your freinds, talk to them a bout the way your feeling. and here is a hug for you.
Melissa At this time of the year a lot of people get in to a funk. but reach out to and lean on your freinds, talk to them a bout the way your feeling. and here is a hug for you.
Thank you Stacey. :) You're right, I'm just battling the blues. It'll all work out, I know it will. It's hard hanging on sometimes. You know the drill. Thank you for the vote of confidence.
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stannosstacey write: Keep your head up, Melissa. Most everyone experiences some type of seasonal depression. I know for me Christmas' in the past would make me feel lonely and wishing I had someone to cuddle up to by the tree. And I can relate to feeling like the odd man out, I really can. Your time is coming. Just be patient and relax and try to enjoy the holiday season.
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stannosstacey write: Keep your head up, Melissa. Most everyone experiences some type of seasonal depression. I know for me Christmas' in the past would make me feel lonely and wishing I had someone to cuddle up to by the tree. And I can relate to feeling like the odd man out, I really can. Your time is coming. Just be patient and relax and try to enjoy the holiday season.
Thank you Stacey. :) You're right, I'm just battling the blues. It'll all work out, I know it will. It's hard hanging on sometimes. You know the drill. Thank you for the vote of confidence.
I understand completely where you are coming from. It is so hard to find those we care for are ill. I hope your boss comes out of this ok. Its harder yet to have to deal with things like this without a partner providing emotional support. But good friends can help too. Don't forget that.
I was single for 12 years after my divorce. I've always felt loneliest at the holidays. You could count the number of "dates" I had in that period on one hand. I know its not what you want but have you considered taking a female friend as your date to the Christmas party? I did that to a couple of company picnics and had a great time doing so.
Hang in there girlfriend. I hope 2008 finds you exactly where you want to be. :)
I understand completely where you are coming from. It is so hard to find those we care for are ill. I hope your boss comes out of this ok. Its harder yet to have to deal with things like this without a partner providing emotional support. But good friends can help too. Don't forget that.
I was single for 12 years after my divorce. I've always felt loneliest at the holidays. You could count the number of "dates" I had in that period on one hand. I know its not what you want but have you considered taking a female friend as your date to the Christmas party? I did that to a couple of company picnics and had a great time doing so.
Hang in there girlfriend. I hope 2008 finds you exactly where you want to be. :)
Keep your head up, Melissa. Most everyone experiences some type of seasonal depression. I know for me Christmas' in the past would make me feel lonely and wishing I had someone to cuddle up to by the tree. And I can relate to feeling like the odd man out, I really can. Your time is coming. Just be patient and relax and try to enjoy the holiday season.
Keep your head up, Melissa. Most everyone experiences some type of seasonal depression. I know for me Christmas' in the past would make me feel lonely and wishing I had someone to cuddle up to by the tree. And I can relate to feeling like the odd man out, I really can. Your time is coming. Just be patient and relax and try to enjoy the holiday season.
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