Miraclous events do occur!!! This year closes on uncertainty and dispair. My universe is open to the positive and astonishing motivation that prayer has created. After a short tenuous angst hovering above me, I am now firmly embedded in my position as educator. Yet, a change in me has arisen from the bleak aspect in my heart's eye.
Newly awakened, my self esteem is freshly presentable in a dawning of a new day. My students were briefly saddened by a year of lay-off threats and strikes. It is horrible to pack up a classroom in front of children. It was my second time dismantling my learning community in the face of my fifth grade patriots. This experience has left me rejuvenated within myself but, it reminds me that education is a business with clients that get the shaft!!!
My new year's resolutions are a myriad of self affirming and uplifting challenges. All of my friends are cheering my re-employment and saying I am a miracle child!!! Its so, awe inspiring that I have a new chance to do more!!! This year has shown me that I am loved and profusely prayed over again..... what a blessing!!!
Now, the real work begins and I promise that I am going to nurture myself and others. So, are you planning for success this year? Is it time to analyze your life and stand up for the future? What are your expectations? Have you optimized your plans for the year? If you expect nothing, you receive nothing!!!!
My heart is set for doing more, are you worthy? Will you take a step forward? I shall...join a sista!!! Optimimum expectations in the NEW YEAR 2007!!!!
Imagine enthusiasm spewing from a fountain of great expectations. Surely, a diva like myself radiates or exudes positivity but, sometimes this energy ebbs!!!! My heart and body has been dedicated to guiding my students to academic victory on our state tests!!!! Everyday pep talks, cheers, songs and my bubbly personality have been gushing from my heart but, life is dynamic and scarcity has a profound determination upon all living things.
So, visualize the images racing through my brain, my recent surprise was a lay-off notice that was presented to me without warning. Of course, I find this to be a divine yet, painful experience which has a recurring echo within the context of my psyche!!!! Now, I find myself sitting in my classroom after hours assisting my students with a heavy heart burdened by the massive indecision and fear dripping in my mind!!! So, I wander to my car deep inside my soul searching anguish......
No tears, no sobs, no emotion but, the sky was brilliant blue and the leaves are swirling around. My spirit was filled with a simple reflection of God's beauty in the world. I enjoy the fall and the myriad of colors that dance in the Michigan landscape. This vision halted all things and I took a long sobering breath into enlightenment. I am blessed!!! I have choices!!! My body began to relax with a new light which allowed me to finally let go!!!
That's why I have allowed the seasonal change to lead me to my next journey....I'm adding another cup of joy with my teaspoon of change. Perhaps, it is time to change or refocus my positivity to another venue but, I am going to open my heart to opportunity!!!!!!!!!!!!! How about you? Do you feel the weight of change? Are you experiencing this season's change? What do you do to heal and reflect?
It is amazing how things change when you stay busy!!! Yesterday, I was overwhelmed by the volume of people helping with my very first tournament. The day was a success and my body was weakened from this experience. Yet, somehow, someway, I found the strength to go out.
Dating is difficult and I admit that, I do not enjoy it in the least. So, I put on my clothes, curled my tresses and jumped in my car on my new adventure. Now, I have been chatting with this gentleman for weeks, it has finally come to this meeting date at Starbucks!!!
Funny, my heart was so, fast, racing and all those old fears rolled around in my head. There's that thought you will be stood up and the calm of finding another alternative of how to leave the building without feeling deflated. After waiting a half hour, I thought how disappointed my walk back to my little red Toyota would feel.
Then, a smiling face walked toward me, my mystery man arrived. Seriously funny, in my mind, I had written him off. Now, a sista had to readjust her attitude.
It was a delightful evening of intellectual conversation and personal revelations. Frank discussions about expectations, hopes, dreams and lost love. It was refreshing and the most positive gentleman I have met in a long time.
Yes, dating is challenging but, its a necessary experience and I have no expectations other than a great friendship and who nows----love. After years of profound fear and self-loathing thoughts, I think I have it!!! Just get out there and be yourself!!!! I'm still open to dating other people but, I am releasing all my past dating experiences and ready for a new experience without fear.
Does anyone out there understand this feeling? I have a few more cups of hope added to my soul......
I've read many of the blogs and it appears many of share the same issues. Yet, do you wonder? Am I doing what I am supposed to do in with my life? Let's face it life can be very hectic!!! I have dated a few people online, friends have hooked me up and my occassional traditional dating attempts. I love online dating because it weeds out some of the crazies---NOT ALL!!!
I know that I would enjoy being in a committed relationship again!!! I am re-evaluating my life and it is time for a change!!! I do not want to date people that don't want to be serious or don't know what they want. Life is to long not to make a difference!!! I'm working on making life better for my family, friends and especially my students.
If you are feeling me, send me some good vibes and positivity!!!! I promised myself this year to be with good people and that's what I am doing!!!
Are you worthy? Do you have a heart to encourage? Is there someone out there willing to take a chance to make a difference? LIVING LA VIDA LOCA, is often working against the mainstream? or reminding people they have a choice!!!!
Let a sista know, are you ready for a change?
Sitting in my car listening to Incognito, I pondered a myriad of emotions. This cd is filled with bittersweet songs and reminders of moving forward. Our economy is lavished with constant negativity and discouraging daily news.
Listening to music helps me calm down and drive with patience. Though, it doesn't erase misfortune or stress but, it can be a delight to switch gears and add a little spice into your life. Music is an emotional experience and a cerebral enterprise.
Does music make your life better? Does it join people together or does it continue to divide culture? Or is it another mask we wear to conceal our true self?
I know it can inspire me or turn my mind to recollections of long ago..... Yes, Incognito has made me wonder as I drive through life, what is around the next corner??????
I come to you with another moment of clarity. Today, I resolved to let go....Yes, I realized that the door to a new and better relationship is barred by the memories and heartbreak of the past. My heart is free and I am removing the remnants of all old pain and past yearns.
Beloved, are any of you holding on to the past....Set yourself free today and give yourself permission to love yourself more then, get up and go out. I dare you today or tomorrow and enjoy the things you love to do and make new friends.
Beloved, get out there!!! I had a blast and I pray you will do something delightful for yourself like try loving you and get out there and play till the light comes up in the East.