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Posted on May 06, 2006 at 04:23 AM

I have just been reading through the blogs placed by both men and women and am fascinated by the comments. I never knew what a blog is and really didnt care. Its part of my indifference to computer technology. I was dragged onto the computer dating site last year by my friend. I wasnt sure what I was looking for having not given much time to my own needs. Work and children tend to suffocate you into thinking that nothing else matters until one day you wake up and have to smell the coffee. Life without a good partner is lonely, boring. Having been married for 25 years and only recently divorced I had to take the time to reevaluate myself and recognise what I needed to be important for the future. Its not easy at 55 years when you have given everything to your partner and the children. I suddenly realized that I had become a non-entity. Joining the sites although a little dubious at first helped. I had so many contacts but gradually I began to think about who and what I am and the type of person/man would best compliment me. Its not easy with so many different characters and personalities but my instinct has helped. There are good and bad men out there just as there are good and bad women. I am an extremely honest individual and as such I have no reason to believe that men will be dishonest and if they are you feel it inside, but I never worry about it because they are being dishonest with themselves so the problem is not mine. One thing I have learned since joining is that time must be spent on what you consider to be finding the right person- just as you give time to your job, children etc then the same must apply with this exercise. As you become older its even more important because we have the experiences and the knowledge - nonetheless the pain we feel when dumped is proably more hurtful than when we are younger. There are times when I feel like giving up on the dating sites and then I reconsider the options. How often do you walk down the street and notice or have anyone noticing you? and how often do you spend even 5 minutes chatting to anyone on the street. This is the joy of the dating sites. The computer is insidious but it also has great potential and I know personally quite a few people who have met and married their online dates. I agree with some of the comments about registration which if you join several sites can be costly but at the same time its important to reach as many people as possible. It may be money well spent or it may be money wasted but we do have a tendency to waste money on one thing or another. I have met and chatted to some good men and those whom I felt were only interested in chatting about sex alone I either told them in the nicest way that I am not interested or simply deleted them. Afterall isnt that what we would do if we met someone in the pub or anywhere else. There are some who may come online completely naked as if as women we should be flattered - not only is it a complete turn off but its also disrespectful. I still havent found whom I consider to be the perfect match but somehow I feel he is out there and the time will come (hopefully before I die!!!!) when he will show his face. Dont give up ladies and gents - we were not meant to spend our lives without a mate so regardless to what our physical appearances or our characters and personalities there is someone with whom we will connect.

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